Memory
by Red Berin
Summary: On a stormy night, Magenta is by herself and can't help but let her mind wonder to what life was once like before coming to Earth. Memories can be painful things, especially when they're what keeps someone going.


I don't own the Rocky Horror Picture Show or Cats or any of the characters in between! This is my first Rocky Horror fanfic and my first songfic. I'm not a huge fan of songfics myself, but I heard this song and this here came to mind.

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_Midnight – not a sound from the pavement_

The room was dark and quiet, just the way Magenta liked it. Columbia had disappeared about an hour ago to who knows where, leaving the domestic a night to sit and brood while waiting for her brother. These lonely nights of thinking followed by time with Riff Raff were Magenta's favorites. They reminded her of why she hadn't snapped yet and why she couldn't.

Quite unexpectedly, thunder broke the crushing silence. After recovering from the shock, Magenta smiled to herself. A storm was on its way. How she loved storms; they always vividly brought back memories of Transsexual.

With the small guilt of her brother's disapproval of her reminiscing, Magenta stood up from the bed. She found the domestic outfit she had been wearing that day on the dresser as she had left it. Thunder roared again as she quickly dressed and headed out the door, eager to find solace in something familiar to home.

She quietly walked down the flight of steps leading to the castle's entrance and hoped that Frank wasn't lurking somewhere nearby. Looking cautiously around the dark entrance, she made her way to the door. Frank would sometimes lock the door and hide the key so Columbia couldn't get out. Magenta tensed up and placed her hand on the handle. It turned easily at her touch. Before walking into the pouring rain, Magenta reached for her coat on the nearby coat rack. Remembering that it was upstairs in her bedroom to be washed the next day, she went for Riff's jacket before realizing it would be safer to go with Columbia's. She was the one most likely to be outside the castle, so Magenta wrapped herself in the coat and headed outside, softly pulling the door shut behind her.

_Has the moon lost her memory?_

_She is smiling alone._

A sheet of rain enveloped the woman as she walked down the front steps and wandered onto the path leading to the back of the castle. The touch of the cool rain felt refreshing on her skin as she sauntered to the small, dead garden in the backyard.

It had been several years since Magenta stopped caring for the garden and now weeds grew amok. They did not bother her, however, as she walked straight through them to the old, familiar granite bench. She closed her eyes and let her head fall back, cherishing the feel of the rain.

She subconsciously pulled a pack of cigarettes and a lighter from the front of her outfit and pulled Columbia's hood over her head to protect the items. Once a cigarette was lit and the rest were stored safely, Magenta sighed in disappointment.

Gazing up at the moon through squinted eyes, she felt betrayed. The moon was able to roam freely through the stars and the night, but here she was, trapped on Earth. It was almost as if the moon was taunting and mocking her. It would come out at night and plunge her into thoughts of Transsexual, but then it would leave her to face the terrible reality of life on Earth.

_In the lamplight, the withered leaves collect at my feet,_

_And the wind begins to moan._

Magenta flicked the ashes from her cigarette just as a gust of wind began to blow. Dead leaves from the garden were picked up in the gust and mixed with the ashes. The red-head watched the scene. Was that how her life was now; dead and moved around carelessly by wind?

_Memory – all alone in the moonlight_

This wasn't the way things always were. Magenta had had a wonderful life on Transsexual and she longed so dearly to be able to go back and live there once more.

Rainy nights always brought Magenta back to her beloved Land of Night. Tonight was no different, and soon she found herself musing over the life she once lived. Riff Raff would have to forgive her. Besides him, these remembrances were what kept her going.

_I can smile at the old days,_

_I was beautiful then._

The childhood years were the best for Magenta. Her family had been whole then. Having two parents that cared was more than a lot of kids had on Transsexual and Magenta regretted never truly appreciating that fact.

The happy family she had once known had been broken when she was just eight years old. Riff Raff had just turned eleven. He wasn't close to anyone at school, so his and Magenta's mother and father got together and made all of Riff's favorite foods. Everything had seemed so wonderful that night, so perfect.

It's funny how things change in almost no time at all. On the day after Riff's birthday, their father had received summons from the queen to go out with the army and fight in a battle against yet another planet that Transsexual had ticked off. Magenta's mother didn't want him to go, in fact, she almost begged him to stay home, but they all knew that he would be in trouble if anyone found out he had stayed at home.

With that summon, lives were changed forever. News came in a week later. He was dead.

Time spent running on the beaches of Transsexual, time spent in her father's arms, times imagined of making her father proud, just like Riff always did, had disappeared in an instant. Magenta always thought of her father when she could. The best of memories brought smiles to her face and the most treasured ones had the strong, brutal power to bring tears to her eyes.

_I was beautiful then._

The years had passed after Magenta's father passed away. Her mother lived in a deep depression for a while, but eventually broke free from it in the worst possible way. Magenta realized, with a deep pain, that it had been years since she had seen her mother without some kind of alcohol in her hand and her other raised to hit one of the siblings.

Once their mother had started drinking, smoking, and whatever else she was doing, Riff Raff and Magenta had turned to each other for support. Years of providing strength for each other had resulted in their own brand of relationship that would never have been approved of on Transsexual.

Riff Raff had always claimed that it was Magenta's beauty that had done him in: the beauty that won and destroyed many boys' hearts. Where had that beauty gone? Riff claimed it was still there, but, besides Columbia, Magenta was the only one that really knew how much makeup she had to use to keep up her appearance. The same appearance that had left many boys at school staring stunned, almost every time she passed and that only wanted her for one thing. Magenta never gave them second glances once Riff Raff had admitted his feelings to her. No one could measure up to Riff.

_I remember the time I knew what happiness was._

Magenta flicked the cigarette onto the ground and let the rain put it out. Tonight was one of those nights. She hated crying, but she could never help herself when she thought of Transsexual and her former life. It had been so long and now it all just seemed like a dream, one, wishful dream.

The first eight years of her life were her best years and she wished to go back to Transsexual just to be closer to where she had lived them. She was loved, cared for, and happy without a worry in the world.

It was a life she could never return to.

In the pouring rain, Magenta lost all her carefully stored composure and slid off the stone bench to kneel onto the soft ground below. She let the tears fall from her eyes and the sobs shake her body.

_Let the memory live again._

Eventually the tears stopped streaming, but Magenta still felt the sobs wracking her body. She felt her eyes closing and didn't bother to attempt to keep them open. Just before she fell asleep, the thought that Riff Raff would find some way to get them both home was the only thing that ran through her mind.

_Every street light seems to beat a fatalistic warning._

Riff wrenched open his bedroom door and scanned it frantically. There was no sign of Magenta. He habitually pulled on his already thin and balding blonde hair before he closed the door quietly and set off to search for his sister in the castle.

He had thought that Magenta would be waiting in his room for him when he didn't find her in her and Columbia's bedroom. However, he had found the room exactly the way he left it earlier that day.

The concerned man ran back down the hallway and down the steps into the castle's entrance area. Once he reached the bottom of the steps, he looked around for any sign of his sister. His eyes passed over the front door at least three times before he thought he knew where she was. Unexpectedly, the sound of Frank's heels clacking on the wooden floor made Riff's heart skip a beat. He slipped out of the front door as quickly and quietly as he could.

Hoping against hope that Frank had not seen or heard him, Riff Raff glanced around the front yard before coming to the conclusion that Magenta was not there. He found the path that led behind the castle and followed it until he saw what used to be her pride and joy.

The breath caught in his throat when he caught sight of Magenta. He ran through the pouring rain, forgetting the fact that he wasn't wearing a jacket, into the weed-infested garden.

_Someone mutters and the streetlamp gutters_

Magenta was suddenly ripped from her dreams and was brought crashing back to reality as her brother shook her awake. He was whispering her name frantically, spurting constant warnings about Frank's patrolling of the castle. Before she could gather her bearings, Riff Raff had pulled Magenta up to her feet and was leading her back to the castle. Each step was taken in a state of small panic.

While they were jogging, Magenta managed to ask how Riff Raff had known where she was. He explained that he had seen Columbia just before he had finished working, so it didn't seem that she would have had been able to get outside with her coat.

The sister relapsed into a quiet silence and depended on her brother to lead the way. As he opened the front door, the clock chimed three times. It was three in the morning.

_And soon it will be morning._

In just four hours the two would have to be awake again to attend to Frank's every whim.

_Daylight, I must wait for the sunrise._

It would be the start of another day. A miserable, wretched, dreadful day.

_I must think of a new life,_

_And I mustn't give in._

Riff Raff skillfully led Magenta up the steps and into his bedroom. He sat down on the bed and pulled his sister down next to him. Magenta shamefully looked at her brother's face, expecting to see the subtle hints of his consternation for her trip into her memories. However, she found his eyes to be filled with sympathy and concern. It took one look, just one, for her to lose control again.

How Riff wished he could do something to ease his sister's pain. He let her bury her face in his shoulder and held her close to his body as she shed silent tears while he ran his hand across her wild hair.

Eventually, Magenta pulled away from Riff Raff. He gave her a compassionate smile as he wiped the smeared makeup from her face.

Magenta wished she could be as strong as her brother. As she stared into his eyes, she made up her mind that she would do whatever she could to help him with getting them home. Home to a new, wonderful life on Transsexual. She swore it to herself that she would help him, no matter what.

The newly formed promise did not come out of her own personal desires as many of her actions originated, but from the desire to provide her brother with everything he could ask for because he would do the same.

_When the dawn comes tonight will be a memory too,_

_And a new day will begin._

In minutes, the siblings were under the single flimsy blanket, huddled close to each other for warmth. Columbia's coat had been flung onto the floor. Without it, Magenta had shivered uncontrollably, so Riff let her wear one of his sleeping outfits.

Riff Raff ran one hand through Magenta's hair and the other up and down her back. He whispered comforting words in her ear. They were words that spoke of their escape from the miserable castle and the desolation from Transsexual. Although Riff tried his best to get her to fall asleep, he knew that she would have another night like this again. He didn't know when or how soon, but he knew there would be more.

Tomorrow, Magenta would act as if nothing had happened, but he wouldn't forget. It was only more inspiration for him to find a way off of Earth. He hated seeing his sister in this state: so vulnerable and heartbroken. It broke his heart.

Slowly, the siblings fell asleep in each other's arms for warmth. The night sky outside cleared up of cloud cover and the rain finally stopped. All too soon, the grays of dawn began to spread across the sky and shone slightly through the musty window.

_Burnt out ends of smoky days,_

_The stale cold smell of morning._

Without wasting any daylight, Frank's shouting began to fill the castle. Riff Raff immediately awoke. He had become so accustomed to Frank's manner of asking for something that he almost always dropped what he was doing to cater to his every whim. After moaning softly into Magenta's hair, he carefully got off the bed, trying his best not to wake his sister. He dressed as fast as he could so that Frank would stop his incessant shouting.

_A street lamp dies, another night is over,_

_Another day is dawning._

As soon as he was dressed, Riff Raff walked over to the bedroom door and opened it. Before he stepped out, he heard something rustling behind him and turned to find Magenta sitting up and blinking sleepily at him.

Magenta began telling Riff Raff to stay, to pretend that he had not heard Frank's calls. Riff gave his sister a wry smile and told her that he had to go or else face punishment. The look of compassion, worry, and sadness that Magenta's face had taken on almost caused Riff himself to cry. He told her to go back to sleep and quickly followed it up by uttering promising words of escape before walking out into the hallway and shutting the door behind him.

_Touch me,_

_It's so easy to leave me_

The door snapped shut. Magenta sat staring blankly at the spot where her brother had stood.

_All alone with my memory_

She brought her knees to her chest and buried her head in her hands. She was alone again with the thoughts she'd grown to look at in a fearful admiration.

_Of my days in the sun._

All Magenta could think about were how powerful and emotional memories could be, especially ones that someone longed for so long to live through again.

_If you touch me,_

_You'll understand what happiness is._

Wondering if Riff Raff brooded over these memories as much as she did, Magenta stood up and began getting ready for her domestic chores of the day. If he did brood, he would understand how she felt. Did he really understand, though? Did the memories bring him as much pain as they brought her? Maybe if she could just talk to him, he would see how much going home meant to her…

_Look, a new day has begun._

It would have to wait until later. She had work to do and it wasn't getting done with her just standing around.

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Well, thanks for reading to all that do! Please be kind and leave some feedback, I would love to be able to improve. Thanks again!


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